Monday, November 4, 2013

I hate November

November is the worst part of the year for me, made even worse this year by being benched.  We have now been trying to conceive for two years.  Two years of hoping, wishing, and heart break.  If I had not miscarried, that baby would be turning one this month.  We would have a one year old.

I never thought it would come to this point.  Everyone always said "oh you'll get pregnant again easily".  For many people that is true.  Most of the girls I knew from my time on TTCAL have gone on to have their rainbow babies.  Yet here my jealous ass sits, wondering if I will ever see a BFP again.

Yesterday marked the start of week #2 on birth control.  They make me extremely impatient and overly emotional.  I hate feeling like this, but will do almost anything if it will fix my lining issues.    It's going to be a fucking long November.    


  1. <3 sending you hugs... I'm so sorry you have to go through this. Just know that you're not alone <3

  2. I'm so sorry... our 2 year mark is this month, too, and that's hard enough as it is. I can't imagine dealing with everything else you've got on your plate on top of that. It's almost surreal - I never imagined it would take 1 year to get pregnant, let alone 2... we just have to keep moving forward.

  3. Big Hugs. I understand that feeling of how in the heck did we get to this point. I hit the two year mark last August and it's hard. Never in my wildest dreams did I think we would end up where we are, 2+ years, 4 IUIs, 2 IVFs, and now a m/c. I hope that the BC does their job and you get off the bench soon. FX for a speedy November!